I cannot save and sanctify myself; I cannot atone for sin; I cannot redeem the world; I cannot make right what is wrong, pure what is impure, holy what is unholy. That is all the sovereign work of God.
That is from My Utmost For His Highest, today's reading. This is a message that so many Christians need to hear. There is a multitude of Christians out there, working their tails off to get rid of all the evil in the world.
News flash: Not Our Job! That's God's responsibility, and he will finish that job with a rather large fanfare one day. You know...trumpets resounding, the Lord descending, etc.?
"The great need is not to do things, but to believe things."
On to the daily reading...
READ
Numbers 35:9-15
This passage is where God instructs the people to designate cities where someone can run if they accidentally kill someone. Eugene Peterson translates this "asylum-cities." The ESV, my favorite translation, renders it "cities of refuge." Note that "asylum," here does not mean "place for insane people." The actual meaning of the word "asylum" is a "secure retreat," or a "place offering protection and safety." The purpose of these "asylum-cities" was to protect someone who accidentally killed someone else from vigilante justice wrought by the family or friends of the victim. It is not to justify killing, but to protect from a wrong type of justice.
THINK
As I think about what this is saying about God, some words come to mind. Understanding, compassionate, just. God is all of these things. Even though he demands justice, he also is understanding that things happen that are not planned. And he created allowances for these things. If it could be proved that a person killed someone after premeditation, they would be extradited from the city and handed over. And if a person who was granted safety in one of these cities left the protection of that city, they were "fair game" to anyone who might be looking for them.
It is kind of a strange concept to our society.
PRAY
I'm told to momentarily set aside the passage and search my heart for anything that might be troubling me today. Exploring recent thoughts, feelings, and events, and my responses to them.
Saturday, I had an adverse response to an unplanned event. Stephanie's computer crashed. We had purchased it at Circuit City less than two months ago, and it had a one year manufacturer's warranty on it, so we took it back to CC. Well, since we didn't purchase their service agreement (which in most cases is 100%profit for them), which almost cost more than the cheap laptop we had purchased, they wouldn't do anything. They only give you 14 days of protective service. Soo...I kind of got mad. It almost ruined my whole day. I still don't want to go back to Circuit City (I already hate Best Buy---these people have totally lost the art of customer service, but that's a subject for my other journal sometime), but I had to backtrack and examine this response.
Then Sunday's sermon was about being "peacemakers." Ouch.
That created a whole new set of feelings/conflicts/responses. I've spent a large part of my adult life being one who creates conflicts rather than trying to resolve them.
Now, mind you, I do possess a bit of a "prophet's spirit" in me. In the various "spiritual gift inventories" that I have done (not a big fan of those either...someday I'll tell you why), "prophecy" came in a close second to "teacher." The reason for this is that I am very defensive of the truth of the Bible. I can't tolerate people teaching/preaching things that are not biblical. This is why I don't like "seeker" churches. This is why I'm opposed to the entire "emerging church" movement. I defend scripture vigorously. This oftentimes creates conflict.
That defense being made, I still need God to work on my "peacemaking" abilities.
I may have gotten a little off track there...let me see if I can recover. As I bring these thoughts, feelings, and responses to God, I picture him entering the room. I share with him what I have been thinking. I'm not at all uncomfortable with this idea, because my feelings are honest and not in any way deceptive or manipulative. I'm not trying to get anything from God. I simply want peace. I want asylum.
LIVE
Has this encounter left me with any questions or new thoughts about how I want to deal with my sin in the future?
I'd say yes. Questions about how to be a better peacemaker. How to respond better to situations that are out of our control. Incidentally, we have mailed the laptop to the Acer Repair center in Temple, TX. It should arrive at their facility today. If they can't fix it, they will send us a new one. It's all good.
Do I have new thoughts on how to deal with sin in my future? I don't know. It seems like I always have nice thoughts about how disciplined I'm going to be, then at the last minute, those fly out the window. I have more time to reflect, this week, because I am on vacation to celebrate our anniversary.
One thing that needs to happen is that I have some songs to write. I need to get on that, before they go away.
"The great need is not to do things, but to believe things."
Believe.
Believe God.